Day After

The night was a restless one. Woke up countless times with my heart beating like crazy, frightened, feeling like someone had touched me, actually feeling the warmth of the hand that was there only in my mind. Woke mom, snuggled up with her and cried until I fell asleep again, only for the whole crap to start over soon thereafter. After many repeats got up feeling tired. Mom, too.

Now I’m feeling on the verge of tears all the time. Arms still wrapped up in bandages. Put some on Little Lola, too.


I think my little me feels the way she looks a lot of the time.



18 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. nobodysreadingme
    Jan 30, 2013 @ 14:25:36

    Despite all that, you still had the spirit and courage and generosity to congratulate me. Thank you.

    • Lola
      Jan 30, 2013 @ 14:38:19

      Why, you’re welcome. It’s nice being happy for you, especially when I’m a bit close to tears today myself. Just happens. Will go away again, I’m sure.

      • nobodysreadingme
        Jan 30, 2013 @ 14:44:11

        Same as always, I’m thinking of you if that helps at all.

        Forgot to mention the shot of Little Lola. It’s really good, Nicely composed and well lit. If you did that on a mobile phone it’s a work of near genius. Even with a point and squirt digital camera it’s damned good.

        • Lola
          Jan 30, 2013 @ 14:56:08

          Thank you, I appreciate your thoughts. 🙂 And thanks. It’s a little point and shoot digital camera. I was lucky with the light as it grew to be day.

          Oh, and utterly unrelated, but can you access your reader?

          • nobodysreadingme
            Jan 30, 2013 @ 14:58:30

            Nope. it’s been out of action for a couple of days. I’ve got you bookmarked though, so it’s my first port of call

            • Lola
              Jan 30, 2013 @ 15:02:15

              My reader worked fine until half an hour ago, now it’s gone and it has taken the stats and everything else with it. And my notification speech bubble on the top right has disappeared and changed to numbers, only they’re not clickable anymore and I don’t see my messages. Only via the dashboard. It’s way annoying.

              (With my luck, I probably broke it. LOL)

            • nobodysreadingme
              Jan 30, 2013 @ 15:10:49

              I know what the problem is here! Technodunce knows an answer! Put it in your diary as a red letter day!
              Somehow you’ve got your browser set in Compatibility mode, which is designed to accommodate slow connections
              If you’re in Explorer, just to the right of the address bar, next to the Refresh button, there’s another one. Hover the cursor over that and it should say if you’re in Compatibility mode.
              If you are, click to come out, and close and reopen WordPress. The Notifications bubble should reappear, and you should (should) be able to access your Reader.

            • Lola
              Jan 30, 2013 @ 15:15:08

              YESSS, thank you!! ❤ That fixed it. Told ya silly me probably broke it. No idea how compatibility mode got switched on. 😕 Anyway, everything is back as it was. Phew. Thanks!!

            • nobodysreadingme
              Jan 30, 2013 @ 15:22:09

              Hey I’m on a roll! Get published and fix a techno problem all in one day.
              The boy’s a genius.
              The Compatibility button’s in a really stupid place. It’s easy to hit it instead of Refresh if you can’t use the keyboard refresh function, and when you do Lo and Behold! the screen refreshes into the new mode and you’re none the wiser.
              Switch to Chrome. I’m no big fan of Google but Explorer is so bloody useless.

            • Lola
              Jan 30, 2013 @ 15:29:46

              I’d switch if I still recalled all my passwords. I have a really rotten memory and am so glad that Explorer remembers them for me. Totally pathetic.

            • nobodysreadingme
              Jan 30, 2013 @ 15:33:53

              Aaah, yes. I see your point. I’m crap at remembering them too. given I have at least 10 email accounts, and errrmmm, let’s think, 8 blogs, plus a couple of Facebook accounts under assumed names as well as my real one, plus Twitter, plus Tumblr….
              It all gets a bit much.

            • Lola
              Jan 30, 2013 @ 15:36:46

              That’s a LOT of accounts, young man, LOL! I just have not even a handful in total and struggle already. Brain = sieve.

            • nobodysreadingme
              Jan 30, 2013 @ 15:41:02

              Well there is method in my madness. I use the bogus accounts to annoy people. I find someone who’s getting on my tits, log out of my real account, log in using one of the bogus accounts, and go and cause mayhem.
              Facebook is really good for this. You can stoke up a firefight, log out and disappear off the face of the earth. then you can log back in under your real name and watch the fireworks from a safe distance.

              Is there a devil’s head emoticon I need to know about?

            • Lola
              Jan 30, 2013 @ 15:48:12

              Naughty. 😈

  2. prideinmadness
    Jan 31, 2013 @ 00:01:21

    I’m sorry you had a rough night! I hope the next one is better!

  3. Bourbon
    Jan 31, 2013 @ 01:54:40

    I hope your arms are okay 😦 xx

    • Lola
      Feb 05, 2013 @ 09:26:48

      My arms are fine, thanks. xx They weren’t physically hurt in the first place, actually, because it was the strangest self-harm episode ever. If you want to, you can read about it here.

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