Situation #1739 I can not cope with

Hello everyone. I have not dropped off the face of the planet. I just haven’t been in any mind to blog. Situation #1739 I can’t cope with is when mom is sick.

Last Thursday my mom came down with a stomach bug, right away, early in the morning. It was nasty. I panic when mom is not her usual, healthy self. Not just feel annoyed or unhappy, but serious panic. I start to worry that she will die. That she will be unable to be there for me. Like, ever again. I feel like I am going to lose her. I know it’s unreasonable, but my emotions don’t care and react anyway.

So when mom started to be unwell, I went into panic mode. Mom said she needed me to be a big girl. And I think I managed, after a fashion. Biggest three year old ever. Crying and refusing to leave mom’s side, unable to focus on anything other than the fact that mom was sick. Helpless, afraid, alone, abandoned, angry, panicky… Not pretty.

Stupid stomach bug is hanging on like for dear life, the fierce fucker. Fifth day now, and mom is still struggling with it, but at least she is better than during the past days. And my sister came home on Friday to help take care of things at home a bit, which helped. But it was still a horrible weekend. Awful bug. I really can’t cope with mom being sick.

PS: thanks for the comments everyone. I’ll reply once mom is better and I am in right mind again. Or in whatever resembles my right mind the closest.

29 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. nobodysreadingme
    Feb 04, 2013 @ 09:38:01

    Nice to have you back. I kinda assumed there must be some sort of crisis, so just left you to get on with things.
    Tell your mom I told her to get well soon.

  2. lostservice22
    Feb 04, 2013 @ 10:15:52

    I hope she is in top shape again soon. no matter who you are it is no fun when some one you love is sick. I always feel helpless when my loved ones are sick. I do what I can but it never feels like enough. don’t forget to take care of your self.

    • Lola
      Feb 05, 2013 @ 09:06:00

      No, no fun at all when people I love are sick. I immediately worry they might die and freak over it. But mom is on the mend now, and that’s good because I’m feeling less stressed again. I hope she’s fully recovered soon.

  3. Grainne
    Feb 04, 2013 @ 14:11:04

    Take good care of your mom honey. I hope she feels better soon. xx

  4. prideinmadness
    Feb 04, 2013 @ 17:31:56

    I hope Mom feels better soon!!

    I hate being sick! It’s never fun! This is the perfect opportunity to, like your mom said, be a big girl! Getting her food or a drink, read to her, play her some nice music, doing something spa-like! I should do that for my Mom actually. I don’t live with her so that makes it hard.

    I hope you’re well 🙂

    • Lola
      Feb 05, 2013 @ 09:02:47

      Thank you! xx I’m better now that mom is on the mend. I’m afraid I suck pretty bad at being a big girl, though. Stresses me pretty bad when mom is unwell, so I probably add more work than I am of help. Guess it’s no coincidence that my sister showed up so quickly. But now that mom is a bit better, I find it easier to do some nice things for her, so that’s what I’m trying to do. 🙂

  5. kat
    Feb 04, 2013 @ 17:38:05

    Sorry your mom is sick. I know you are scared and worried. But she’ll get better soon. Hang in there.

  6. Bourbon
    Feb 04, 2013 @ 18:49:56

    Aww, get well soon to your mum! xx

  7. Juliet
    Feb 04, 2013 @ 22:34:02

    I’m sorry to hear that your mother is sick and you’re struggling like this. I hope she’ll get well soon again! xx

    • Lola
      Feb 05, 2013 @ 08:57:44

      Thank you, Juliet. xx It’s some fierce virus or something. She’s still not fully rid of it, but on the mend.

  8. nobodysreadingme
    Feb 05, 2013 @ 21:48:49

    Lola, i got a bit mad here. People telling you how to behave. It made me very cross indeed. ‘Do this honey.’
    That is so much rubbish.It’s rubbish.
    I’m sure they wish you well. No doubt at all.
    But it may not help you. It may, in which case good luck.
    But you’ll never get advice from me.
    Does that make sense? Why should I be so mad about the advice thing?
    Sorry. Block me if you want.

    • Lola
      Feb 14, 2013 @ 09:20:45

      No, I don’t block you, silly. It’s sweet that you get mad on my behalf. I think the advice thing is always a bit awkward, because how would anyone know what’s best for me (other than people who know me really, really well, maybe, like me mom). I agree that advice means that people wish me well and I try to see it as suggestions of things I *could* do, if they feel right to me. So I try to appreciate them for the other person’s good intention, but don’t think that I literally need to follow the advice. 🙂

      • nobodysreadingme
        Feb 14, 2013 @ 10:07:02

        Phew, that’s a relief. One thing I don’t like is that if you make comments you can’t take them back.But I didn’t want to, really. I was genuinely angry.
        Nice to see you back.
        I’ve been worried, but reckoned you’d reactivate yourself in your own good time, so just left you to it.

        • Lola
          Feb 14, 2013 @ 11:42:08

          Hi Dunk! No, no worrying. 🙂 I’m only half back, though, as I don’t really have much of a mind to be on the laptop since mom recovered from her bug. So while I’m well, quite well actually, I want to spend my time with mom at the moment, because her being sick rocked me quite a bit. 🙂 I hope you’re good, though?

          • nobodysreadingme
            Feb 14, 2013 @ 11:54:18

            Spending time with your mum sounds like a damn fine idea to me. I don’t blame you for wanting to lay back a bit.
            I’m good thanks. OPne of my short stories made it to #5 in the download lists last week, so I’m pretty chuffed about that.
            Just completed a four part four day blogathon prompted by a remark from my mate unftteredbs. That was tough. 1500 words a day for four days, working to a deadline. So I’m laying back a bit too.
            Say hello to your mum for me. I’m glad she’s better. Must have been a very scary time for you.
            I’ll keep on checkig for when you blog again. Until then, stay cool.

            • Lola
              Feb 15, 2013 @ 18:40:37

              Congrats on your story ranking so high! That’s wonderful! You deserve it!! I’ll say hi to my mom for you. And yes, keep checking in. I’ll blog when I feel like it again. 🙂

  9. AmendaT (@AmendaT)
    Feb 10, 2013 @ 17:03:06

    Don’t worry, she’s strong 🙂 All and all, may she get well soon!

    See, even this cute little thing is coming to visit her 😉

  10. Kathy Pickett
    Feb 11, 2013 @ 13:23:21

    Thank you for sharing your story. Reading it has helped me better understand a sweet friend. Thank you!

  11. Dan
    Feb 13, 2013 @ 22:35:43

    I just finished reading your blog entries. Great stuff! It will help me understand a friend as well as myself. Keep blogging!

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