To This Day ~ a beautiful, powerful video-poem

Just found this on youtube. Loved it and wanted to share.

Me (a poem)


by Lola

Who is this “me”?

the pieces are falling,

skittering, sprawling

all over the place

at an unsettling pace

Who am I to be?


How am I to feel?


feelings luring and baiting

ready and waiting

to make me reel.


What is the time?

Past, future, present

with fraudulent intent

mix up to confuse me

to bruise and abuse me

outlasting the crime.


When will it end?

the strength-sapping fighting

my attempt at re-writing

this future foregone?

I’m not yet done.


My mind is unsteady

but I am not ready

to bend



The Tail of the Bird – a silly but tragic poem

Okay, I’m in a somewhat silly mood right now, so I’ll post a somewhat silly poem. With a tragic ending. 😉

I hope you can read my scrawl.


And because the contrast is poor and it’s hard to read, here’s what it says neatly typed out:

The Tail of the Bird
by Lola

the kitty went to sleep
its treasure safe to keep

a bird went by
and since it could fly
at the treasure it would leap
– to steal it

with its beak it took the treasure
but it went beyond its measure
– no real wit

so instead of flying
it learned a lesson in dying.
Tail and all.

(It really only makes sense along with the pictures, though. 😉 )

The Tail of the Kitty – a humoristic children’s poem on serious life lessons

Okay, enough talk of abuse and whatnot today. I just got my feelings back and need something lighthearted and fun and thought I’d share a poem I’ve written.


It scanned fairly okay, but in case you can’t decipher my handwriting, here’s what it reads.


The tail of the kitty
by Lola

Once a kitty lay awake
and thought of funny things to make
and since it was alone at home
it started every room to roam.

The first room held a dresser
five stories high, no lesser.
The kitty climbs, then slips its paw
came tumbling down by natures law.

The lesson kitty learned?
Success got to be earned!

A dark room was the second
“Just hurry!” kitty reckoned
It ran, bumped into things and more.
Oh geez, was our kitty sore!

The kitty’s lesson settled deep:
You must look before you leap!

Into the third room kitty peeked
it hurt, was sore, for mommy seeked
it saw her sleeping in her bed
and almost started to run like mad
but then stopped in its track
and thought a little back.
It looked before it leaped
and: successfully with mommy sleeped!


Haha, and now don’t tell me it’s got silly rhymes and wrong words. That’s why it is a children’s poem. 😉 😀


Thanks to my Mom

For Mom

For Mom


Thanks, Mom, to you
for putting up with me another year
thanks are way overdue
you find my screws that disappear
and that’s why I love you.
(One of the reasons I hold dear
your love, at least, for sure.)

With Love,

Journey to Myself

Journey to Myself

Journey to Myself
by Lola (2012)

stagger on into the velvet darkness of the night
stagger on ‘till so-called civilization’s out of sight
creep through the undergrowth where beast roams free
where wild and danger every fate foresee.

sleep on dusty ground as hard as sturdy steel
that’s dry and bursts from drought it can not feel
for safety take that withered trunk of old
forgotten in this desert’s gruesome cold.

then try to cross a murky, muddy bog
across unsteady waters and the densest fog
for help you need to trust a boat that’s leaking
but still you must go on, if you’re still seeking.

you’re welcomed by the raging flames of fire
that try to turn away whatever sick desire
has made you withstand beast and cold and danger
within this land, to which you are a stranger.

to try you further, you will find demonic traps
‘tween tiny patches of solid ground to place your steps
watch out for ancient daggers, pits and spears
avoid the sirens’ gentle tempting song of tears.

if you have lasted, enter now a maze
that turns your senses upside down in daze
that tries to lure you down each deadly end
where naked branches o’er your cold bed bend

and if you happen yet to want still more
the maze will lead you to a stony shore
where you will have to swim across an ocean
that notices your each and every motion.

for if you want to find that tiny isle
you have to swim abandoned, mile for mile
stripped of your every nice possession
that drags you down to horrid beasts’ aggression.

And if, at last, all wet and tired you arrive
be greeted by a sharp and thirsty knife
then try to dodge its fierce and deadly blow
until your skill and sturdiness do grow.

if you survived, if you still got your wit
then for the last and hardest quest you’re fit
you’ve got to find my castle on this empty island
obeying to my rules, ‘cause this is my land.

but if my door will open up to you
all stripped to skin, no shirt, no shoe
you need to be afraid no more
‘cause safety’s starting right behind my door.

Riches – a lighthearted poem on a little everyday insanity

Riches,Riches poem1

It’s a poem I wrote in response to a show I saw on TV about how people go Christmas shopping. It’s meant in a fun and lighthearted way, but I think it’s got a little truth at the core.  Since the picture turned out a bit small to read it well (and I also made some spelling mistakes), here is what it reads:


by Lola

Riches, riches people gather
spoon of gold and couch of leather
expensive car’s no luxury
tinsel in the treasury
who has got the biggest jewel?
is the question that is fuel
to the common man’s desire
which makes him withstand hell and fire
on his eternal quest for more
losing sight of solid shore.

The sea of riches will fulfill
man’s addicted strive until
the grass next door seems greener still.

By the way, it doesn’t matter
what kind of riches people gather
as long as they collect with greed
stuff that they don’t really need
just to show off their possession
or – respective – their profession.
The thing itself is not of value
(Of course that’s not what they would tell you!)
It’s other people’s praise they seek
– what other people about them speak.

Which in itself does not give credit
to self esteem (well, if they had it).
A content life? They can forget it.

This is the truth you must endure:
Gather riches and stay poor!


In my approach to see the good things about Christmas, I wish for everyone to keep in mind and to appreciate the things that really matter in life and to remember that those are rarely found under a tree! 😉

Rip Me, Rape Me ~ a poem

Please take care, it’s a poem about childhood sexual abuse and can probably be triggering.

And if you can’t decipher my scrawl, here is my poem typed out:

Rip Me, Rape Me
by Lola

Rip me, rape me, suffocate my youth
Steal away my innocence
Humiliate my truth

Mutilate my body, rip it into shreds
Kiss me with your blameful lips,
Manipulate my head

Tie me into knots that you know I can’t undo
Threaten, make fake promises, enslave my heart to you

Dress me up in shame and guilt – turn love into a sin
Force your body into mine – I’m your garbage bin

So as I lay you have your say
We both know who you’re killing
You tell me this is what I want
And of the void you’re filling

And when I dare to speak my mind,
Mom, your voice is chilling
You look me in the eye and say:
“It’s not rape when you are willing!”

Just a poem

It’s not often as I wish it were, but every now and then I write poems. Here’s one I’ve written some time ago, but thought about a lot recently. No great poetry. Just my feelings.

And in case you can’t read my scrawl:

Love you – hate you – love you
do you or don’t you
need you to love me, too

Alive in your presence
if you see the essence
of me

Afraid to love you
I try to abuse you
to drive you away
but I want you to stay
with me

as close as you can
hold me tight
If you love me,
I’m alright.

by Lola

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